Paul and Clive are a little pissed and while in the pub, Paul starts mumbling away. "I'm going to go rob a bank tomorrow. I plan on dressing up in a clown wig and make-up and only wearing a thong and nipple tassels.
"I'll carry a goat and a can of fluorescent paint in one arm and while in the bank, I'm going to fuck the goat and throw the paint over the walls, all the time ripping up pages of a phonebook and swearing my head off. After getting the money, I'll take a shit on the floor and piss everywhere. I then will escape in a van shaped like a giant pink cock.
Let's see Crimewatch fucking stage a reconstruction of that!"